RE: Sam’s Hangout #114 - “PARENTS AND UNSPOKEN FEELINGS”

Good morning my beautiful friends, how are you all? Today will be a kind of busy day for me, that's why I decided to wake up early to participate because I don't want to be left out 😄😄😄.

The way we were raised, communication was never a problem, infact I grew up knowing that I could discuss almost anything with my parents face to face. So I don't think I have any unspoken feelings or grievances that I have been unable to share with them.

Something happened on my traditional marriage day that stood out for me till dates, My father became emotional and was seen shedding tears. When people asked him why he was crying, he replied that among all his children, I was the one who would always tell him directly whenever he did something wrong. He actually appreciated my honesty and openness, and yes that was how close we were even up till dates.

Growing up, I never hid things from my parents. Not even when a young man approaches me on the road or expressed interest in me 🫣🫣🫣, I would still go home and tell my parents about it. That was how close we were. I never felt afraid for once to share my thoughts, feelings, or experiences with them.

Today, I try to apply the same principle in raising my own children. I want them to see me as someone they can trust and talk to freely. We joke together, we eat together, we chat about different things, and I make it a habit to ask them about their day at school, or whatever that happens around them. More importantly, I can be a good listener when it comes to my children. I leave whatever I'm doing and listen when they talk. I believe that being a good listener will help them feel valued and understood, and even open to discussing more with me.

I don't know if it's only me that has noticed that children nowadays can be quite different. My eldest son, for example, is naturally reserved and prefers to keep things to himself. He does not easily talk about what is happening in his life, not because he is hiding something, but he doesn't know how to express himself naturally, so to speak. Because of this, I make a conscious effort to engage him in conversations. I constantly reassure him that he can tell me anything, whether it is good or bad, and that I will always be there to support him, I will shower him with praises, call him pet names just to make him smile and feel relaxed. I also try to pay attention to changes in his behavior and make out time to have a meaningful discussion with him. Gradually, he has started opening up and sharing personal stuffs with me, and it brings me great joy.

Yes keeping communication open has blessed me with a close relationship with my parents, and it is a value that I am trying hard to pass on to my children as well.

Biko, who dey there, @luchyl @nkemakonam89 @daverick make una come collect 🎤, I want go back to sleep.