SECRET N° 336 The Shell Wars 20 END

Chapitre 20 : Le Dernier Craquement

(OĂč tout s’achĂšve, tout commence, et une noisette dĂ©cide de l’avenir du monde.)

AU BORD DE L’EFFONDREMENT
La forĂȘt Ă©tait Ă  genoux.
Les arbres pleuraient des feuilles en silence.
La mousse n’osait plus pousser sans consulter un avocat.
Les Ă©cureuils portaient des casques. Les grenouilles fredonnaient des marches funĂšbres. MĂȘme les hiboux ne faisaient plus de rimes. C’était grave.

Au sommet d’un vieux chĂȘne, Castagnor observait la vallĂ©e.
À ses cĂŽtĂ©s : Belladonna, Speedo (traĂźnant un sac plein de documents de guerre, un dictionnaire, et un pot de crĂšme hydratante), Pluminette, Jean-Rasoir (armĂ© d’une torche ET d’un livre de poĂ©sie), et Agent Chiffon, impeccablement repassĂ©.

La ForĂȘt attendait une fin.

Mais laquelle ?

L’APPEL DU CONSEIL SUPRÊME DE LA CLAIRIÈRE SACRÉE
À l’aube, une rumeur traversa les feuilles :
Le Conseil SuprĂȘme se rĂ©unirait une derniĂšre fois.
Tous les peuples Ă©taient conviĂ©s. Toutes les espĂšces. MĂȘme les parasites (sous escorte).

But : dĂ©cider de l’avenir de la ForĂȘt. Et surtout
 qui aurait la derniĂšre Noisette DorĂ©e, symbole de pouvoir suprĂȘme.

L’Écureuil suprĂȘme ?
Le Crabe Déchu ?
Le Moumou du Nord ?
Ou
 quelqu’un d’inattendu ?

UNE ASSEMBLÉE ABSURDE
Sur la grande clairiÚre, des siÚges faits de champignons, de pommes de pin ou de tartines rassis furent disposés.

On y vit :

Les Castors Patriotes (avec des pancartes "NOISETTE OU RIEN !")

Les Chats de Salon (derniĂšre faction de Lord Moumou, tous en peignoir)

Le Peuple des Mouches (venu pour les restes)

Les Escargots Réformistes (arrivés avec trois jours de retard)

Doudourax, qui avait monté une scÚne et répétait déjà son aria : "NOISETTA MIAAAA"

Castagnor prit la parole :

— "Assez de combats. Assez de fromage explosif. Assez de dĂ©bats en alexandrins. Il est temps de voter."

Un murmure parcourut l’assemblĂ©e.
Un vote ? En démocratie ? Sans bagarre ?

Incroyable.

LE VOTE (AVEC UN PEU DE TRICHE)
Chaque espĂšce remit sa noisette de vote dans l’urne sacrĂ©e (une vieille souche peinte en dorĂ©).
Des tensions montaient. Jean-Rasoir s’improvisait vigile. Pluminette comptait à l’envers. Doudourax chantait "À nos noix" en boucle.

Résultat : égalité parfaite entre tous les candidats.

Panique.

Jusqu’à ce que Speedo s’avance
 trùs lentement


 et sorte de sa coquille


 une vieille noisette poussiéreuse.

— "Celle-ci appartenait au Premier Arbre. Elle compte triple."

Personne ne comprit vraiment pourquoi. Mais tout le monde hocha la tĂȘte. (Parce que la dĂ©mocratie, c’est parfois aussi du flou.)

Speedo déposa sa noisette pour un nom inattendu :

“Personne.”

Silence. Puis murmures. Puis cris. Puis... applaudissements.

UN NOUVEL ORDRE
Il fut dĂ©cidĂ© que plus aucun rĂšgne unique ne gouvernerait la ForĂȘt.

La Noisette Dorée serait plantée dans la terre, comme un arbre à idées.

Chaque clan partagerait la gestion de la forĂȘt, avec un Conseil tournant tous les Ă©quinoxes.

Le commerce des noisettes serait régi par un traité multiespÚces (appelé le Nut-accord).

Et les troupes seraient dĂ©mobilisĂ©es
 sauf Jean-Rasoir, qu’on laissa jouer avec des allumettes dans un enclos sĂ©curisĂ©.

ÉPILOGUE : DÉBUT D’UNE NOUVELLE ÈRE
Un an plus tard


Les castors construisent des écoles.

Les chats dirigent une chaßne de salons de thé.

Les écureuils organisent des festivals de cirque.

Speedo est devenu consultant en lente stratégie.

Pluminette dirige un orchestre inter-espĂšces.

Et Castagnor
 cultive des champignons zen dans un hamac.

Et la ForĂȘt ?
Elle rit, elle pousse, elle chante, parfois elle rote (merci Doudourax), mais elle est en paix.

Car elle a compris une chose :

"La vraie richesse, ce ne sont pas les noisettes. Ce sont les histoires qu’on raconte autour."

🎉 FIN 🎉

Chapter 20: The Last Crack

(Where everything ends, everything begins, and a single nut decides the fate of the world.)

ON THE BRINK OF COLLAPSE
The forest was on its knees.
The trees shed leaves in silence.
Moss refused to grow without consulting a lawyer.
Squirrels wore helmets. Frogs hummed funeral marches. Even the owls stopped rhyming. That’s how serious it was.

At the top of an ancient oak, Castagnor looked out over the valley.
Beside him: Belladonna, Speedo (dragging a bag full of war documents, a dictionary, and a jar of moisturizing cream), Pluminette, Jean-Rasoir (armed with a torch and a poetry book), and Agent Chiffon, immaculately ironed.

The Forest waited for an ending.

But what kind?

THE CALL OF THE SUPREME COUNCIL OF THE SACRED CLEARING
At dawn, a rumor rustled through the leaves:
The Supreme Council would meet one final time.
All species were summoned. Every creature. Even parasites (under supervision).

Purpose: to decide the future of the Forest. And most importantly
 who would hold the last Golden Nut, the ultimate symbol of power.

The Squirrel General?
The Fallen Crab?
The Northern Fluffbeast?
Or
 someone no one expected?

A RIDICULOUS ASSEMBLY
In the grand clearing, seats made of mushrooms, pinecones, and stale toast were arranged.

There came:

The Patriotic Beavers (waving signs like "NUT OR BUST!")

The Lounge Cats (remnants of Lord Moumou’s regime, all in bathrobes)

The Fly Collective (mostly after snacks)

The Reformist Snails (who arrived three days late)

And Doudourax, who had set up a stage and was rehearsing his aria: “NOISETTA MIAAAA”

Castagnor stepped forward:

— “Enough of battles. Enough of exploding cheese. Enough of debates in verse. It’s time to vote.”

A hush swept through the assembly.
A vote? Democracy? No brawling?

Unbelievable.

THE VOTE (WITH A BIT OF CHEATING)
Each species dropped their nut-vote into the sacred urn (an old stump painted gold).
Tensions flared. Jean-Rasoir played bodyguard. Pluminette counted backward. Doudourax kept singing “To Our Nuts” on loop.

Results: a perfect tie.

Panic.

Until Speedo stepped forward
 very slowly


 and pulled from his shell


 a dusty, ancient nut.

— “This belonged to the First Tree. It counts triple.”

No one really understood why. But everyone nodded. (Because democracy is sometimes mostly vibes.)

Speedo cast his nut for an unexpected name:

“No one.”

Silence. Then murmurs. Then cheers. Then... wild applause.

A NEW ORDER
It was decided that no single ruler would govern the Forest anymore.

The Golden Nut would be planted into the earth, as a tree of ideas.

Every clan would share leadership through a rotating council at every equinox.

The nut economy would be regulated by a multi-species treaty (called the Nut-Accord).

And all troops would be disbanded
 except for Jean-Rasoir, who was allowed to play with matches inside a secure enclosure.

EPILOGUE: THE DAWN OF A NEW AGE
One year later


The beavers build schools.

The cats run a chain of forest tea salons.

The squirrels host interspecies circus festivals.

Speedo is now a consultant in slow strategy.

Pluminette conducts a pan-species orchestra.

And Castagnor
 cultivates zen mushrooms in a hammock.

And the Forest?
It laughs, it grows, it sings, sometimes it burps (thanks, Doudourax), but it is at peace.

Because it has understood one simple truth:

“The true treasure isn’t the nuts. It’s the stories we tell around them.”

🎉 THE END 🎉

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27 comments

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