..
I was never able to build connections. There is something in human interactions that I couldn't seem to grasp, something that's innate and trivial to others but always eluded me.
As far as I am concerned I was always alone, I could joke that when I was born both my parents missed the date. The lack of socialization during my infancy might have contributed to that, or the fact that my brain doesn't seem to function like everyone else's.
On the other hand, what my brain lacks on the nuances of human communication, it makes up with machines. They don't do subtext, they don't deal in double meanings and innuendos. With them is only ones and zeros, just true or false, and this is something I can work with.
It's a work that pays well, especially when you can get into places you aren't supposed to enter.
Sadly AI is still doing baby steps and although it can alleviate a little of the loneliness, it lacks soul. The fear we might not reach the era of sentient artificial intelligence during my lifetime keeps me up at night. During one of these sleepless nights I stumbled upon an amazing discovery: between the layers of data there is a whole universe! The public doesn't know about that yet, but it has so many weird and fascinating implications! If they are in a simulation, what can guarantee we also aren't in one? How those life forms based in 0s and 1s come to exist? And especially, how did they achieve sentience?
Studying and observing them became my life purpose. The more I watched, the more I got infatuated by those digital citizens. But one event would change my world forever. Previously to a meeting between diplomats from both our worlds, two pixel denizen suddenly merged into a single entity, encompassed by both their personalities, knowledge and aspirations. They could fuse into a single being! They could reach an understanding of each other that us carbon based forms could only dream of!
And I dreamt a lot about that already. Ever since I watched a show many years ago about anthropomorphic alien gemstones that could fuse in a similar fashion, this impossible dream never left my mind. I couldn't let it be a dream any longer. Gathering all the resources and information I could get by any means available, no matter the morality of it. I put my everything into this project: my ascension from this flesh prison to finally connect with something that will be able to understand me, an amalgamation that will never ever feel lonely again.
...and now, all that is left is pulling the trigger.
click
"end of recording"
The skeleton clutching the shotgun had lost its flesh long ago, your team having taken months trying to figure out where the information breach was coming from. The knowledge of the pixel verse, meant to be kept as a secret, had reached all corners of the internet.
At first people thought it was a hoax but evidence started piling up very fast and equally fast was the public reaction; people were scared, religions were being created, anti-pixel sentiment now on the rise.
And in the midst of the chaos, the world government was trying to extinguish fires everywhere and reach favorable diplomatic outcomes with our new neighbors.
The static in the monitor was the only thing illuminating the cluttered room aside from the small power lights from various devices. You turn your tactical light back on, but soon after someone finds a light switch. The mold covering the blood splatter on the wall was the only remainder of organic life left in this tomb, partially covering posters of old cartoons and shows, strongly themed around friendship.
From the back of the skull, a strange cable can be seen linking its hollow insides to the machinery, in a grim homage to pre-2000's science fiction.
The silence, undisturbed by the soft whirring sound of the computers on stand-by, was then broken by questions regarding the procedure and about whether the person did the surgery to connect the cable by themselves. A slight tap from the gun barrel shook the fragile balance that held the corpse together, sending a small dust cloud upwards.
As in an attempt to justify himself or, maybe, to convince himself of his entitlement to what he had done, the recording starts replaying unprompted. Hearing his voice again triggers a vein to slightly bulge in your forehead, but your face remained unaltered.
Your crew was as skeletal as the carcass in front of you, overworked and understaffed for the task due to the ongoing crisis. The bone pile was probably the first victim of the world clash and because of their own selfish actions, he wouldn't be the last.
Your fist clenches onto your gun as you hold the necklace that your daughter gave to you, one of her last mementos before she attempted the "world shifting pixel fusion" TikTok challenge.
Thanks for reading. It feels realy weird to be writing again after so long, hope you enjoyed my entry.
Dear judges, please give critiscism and tips! I would appreciate it a lot.
Thanks #scholarandscribe and #riseofthepixels for the contest!
hopefuly this won't be the last time we see each other again.
Glad to see you posting again @trashyomen it's been a long time!
It has indeed! Sorry for not replying earlier!!
Ok, I will admit I forgot about you again Trashy. š But, I'm here now! So let's get into this.
In general, you have a good handle on things. It is evident you have passed the beginner steps and are trying out stuff. FGlexing your writing muscles as it were. This is good, but it also leaves some choppiness behind. Like the following sentence for example:
That bad boy makes no sense no matter how you slice it. š Guiding the reader along with our writing is a skill that is acquired through lots of practice. I think from your paragraph structure that you already know this, but sometimes you let go of the rope and cause confusion. I won't harp on this since it seems you are already aware of it, but it bears mentioning. š»
Another thing I noticed is your use of the passive voice. The passive voice has a place in writing, but more often than not we want to avoid it. To make an example of this we can use the very next sentence:
Imagine if this was written as You know what keeps me up at night? Sentient Artificial Intelligence. or My dreams are haunted by the notion of not reaching sentient AI. etc. I get that the passive voice is very attractive because it allows us to build up our statement, but more often than not it is just the path of least resistance. Our writing flows much better when we don't use it.
For more on active and passive voice, click here!
Of course, these should be regarded as simply tools in your toolbox. There are no rules to writing. That's the beauty of it. We can do whatever we want. But some guidelines are there for a reason. It is up to you to decide how far you are willing to go astray the predetermined path.
Hope that was useful. š I gotta say your characterization and pacing were both on point. Super impressive stuff. š You have big ideas but translating said ideas to paper takes time and practice. šÆ
..š„ŗ Grocko senpai said I'm forgortable
šš (/j š¹)
Thank you so much for taking the time to review and give tips!!
Yeah, that one got really confusing now that you pointed it out, I was trying to say those chat bots AI like chat gpt can help with keeping company but did a poor job on that, I will keep it in mind and try to explain things better!
I will confess that grammar is not my forte, that said I will study more the passive voice to avoid it.
Again, thank you so much for helping me out!!
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