Real Talk Weekend Prompt Step Into the Hot Seat #1
Hello Real Talkers!
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Remember in our introduction post when we said we’d be doing something special for weekends? Well… here it is!
Every week, we’ll gather all the best questions asked in our Discord community and post them here on Hive for our Weekend Prompt also known as the #HotSeat. These questions are straight from the minds of our members real people, real thoughts, real talk.
In courtesy of the Weekend Prompt
Originally inspired by:
@sam.hangout – creator of the Hangout vibes.
While our motive for the Real Talk Weekend Prompt is a little different, these amazing initiatives inspired us in their own way. Here, we aim to take questions gathered from our Discord during the week and open them up for deeper, thought provoking discussion on Hive.
If you need anything to ask, please feel free to drop your question in our Discord it might just make it into the next Weekend Prompt!
Objective
The Real Talk #HotSeat Weekend Prompt is designed to:
Bring our Discord conversations to Hive so everyone can join in.
Encourage members to share personal insights, life experiences, and honest opinions.
Strengthen connections between question askers and responders.
Spark meaningful engagement that goes beyond surface-level comments.
If you need anything to ask, please feel free to drop your question in our Discord channel it might just make it into the next Weekend Prompt!
How to Participate
- Pick one question from the list below.
- Reply to it in the comments section of this post.
- Tag the person who asked the question (their name is beside it) so they’ll know you’ve answered.
- You can only tag one person per comment but you can answer more than one question if you want (in separate comments).
We believe everyone here has unique perspectives and your answer might be exactly what someone needs to hear!
This is your time in the #HotSeat answer honestly, speak your mind, and don’t hold back.
This Week’s #HotSeat Questions
Why do men have to hide their emotions?
To them they feel showing it makes them look weak.
The author went on to explain:
I was chatting with a male friend some days ago, and he told me how he wouldn't sleep out of excitement that his girlfriend would be visiting him after 4 months of being away.
At a point he thought he was doing too much. He hoped to hide his excitement a bit from his girlfriend, so he wouldn't look weak.
Most men too, certainly not gays, find the need to freely express themselves but restrict themselves, feeling it's a bit feminine in nature.
Is this seen as normal or just something they have to grow to accept?
Have you ever been made to feel “not enough” through comparison?
What do you think you need to do rightly to be seen and heard in this ecosystem called Hive?
Special Reward
At the end of the weekend, the person whose question gets the most replies (meaning the most times they’re tagged in the comments) will receive 4 HIVE as a reward from us.
So whether you’re answering or asking, you’ve got a reason to join in!
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Let’s get the Real Talk going! Drop your answer below and tag the person you’re replying to.
@zali.bee
This is what I think most Nigerians faced from a young age.
When we are little our parents chose the wrong approach by comparing us with others(our age mates though).
That they never saw the little we did.
This traumatized lots of people.
Now, we are grown and still have to go through that.
If you check well, the people who induce the never enough are people who went through the trauma when they were little.
Now, they tend to rob it on others to make them feel better.
The mindset itself doesn't help in this case.
It builds and makes room for accepting to look out for what we haven't achieved, not trying to appreciate the journey so far.
It even encourages the comparison, though most people take this as challenging themselves to do more better.
But when it's mentally affecting you, this sometimes might trigger you to work hard and not work smart.
Hmmm you have said it all dear. It's not easy o infact i had that experience first hand and i can tell how it affects me emotionally and mentally. I relent academically because what's the point of trying when it's always seen as worthless or not enough effort.
There are other ways to handle matters i totally disagree with comparison.🤔
It's well dear.
No matter what you do in life, there will be people out there that won't be satisfied.
So, it's best not to consider people opinion on that.
And you can't fight people's opinion because it's individual differences.
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@jmis101
Talking about "Why do Men hide their emotions?", well, both men and women have this faculty of emotions, but women are naturally known to display this emotion more easily than Men do.
The truth is; Men don't hide emotions, they only exhibit this emotion in different ways (depending on the individual) as strong vessels. Women make theirs easily noticeable, while men melt this emotion into strength.
A woman can be wounded emotionally, she cries bitterly. A man can be wounded emotionally, he smiles and works away. Sometimes, like I said; depending on the individual, some men will express this by needing sometime for themselves while smoking 🚬 ( for men that smoke ), while some men, will spend unhealthy hours at a beer parlor drinking, some will need to discuss with friends about some random things to keep him happy and some will play games for unhealthy amount of time.
They don't hide these emotions, they only display them in different ways which you might find difficult to comprehend.
Really 🤔 this is interesting.
This explains it.
Thank you very much for this.
@jmis101 men tend to hide their feelings because of societal expectations, the society expect men to be strong at all time that's why we hear words like "man up, & men don't cry" so in other to leave up to the expectations they lock up their feelings.
While some men on the other hand hide their feelings because they don't want to be vulnerable and some lack emotions.
But in all they have feelings and they just mask it up waiting for a safe space to let it all out.s
Yes,let it out somewhere.
I am beginning to understand this.
Thank you very much dear for this.
@jmis101
Everyone shows emotions,both male and female. In the aspect of relationship,it is nowadays,well I will say due to past experiences that makes partners hide some of their emotions , feeling their partner might use their weak point against them . Not only guys hide their emotions, girls do too, we feel like so he won't think I'm desperate or feel like I'm cheap .
Hiding emotions comes from fear of being used.
Really 🤔
This is sad.
Thank you very much dear for this.
I kind of find the question posed by @jmis101 somewhat interesting and within my forte. So here goes my honest, experiential reply.
Most guys like to hide their emotions from their female partners or girlfriends based on two factors....
#1. The African mentality that it is not a masculine thing to do.
#2. Their god complex.
The African soil has successfully ingrained it into the male folks that showing emotion is a sign of weakness. Not just that, they celebrate explosive outbursts of anger, pride and wrath but shun other emotions like happiness, joy, love and passion. This is the reason why a guy who is truly happy to be in a love relationship with his girlfriend would be playing macho up and down like a disowned peacock. *No wonder girls are into k-drama, where the emotions are real.
Secondly, the god complex in men which is fueled by their ego makes them think that they are small or petty when they show emotions or how they feel to their lovers. Some might even go as far as saying that they would be taken for granted by the woman if they show her what they really feel.
This to me is the height of insecurity. I mean reason with me now ...
You liked me, walked up to me and toasted me like a fine girl that I am. Then after much doings, I finally agree and the next stunt you pull on me is to indifferent. Brotherly, no vex, you go pack and go.
One thing we must understand is that emotions helps our relationship. How do I know if I am pleasing you or displeasing you?
How do I know if I as your girlfriend, I'm doing the things you like to make you happy if you don't react with an emotion.
Chai
Mama
God go bless you oo
It is becoming more and more clearer to me.
Because I was just wondering why.
Like why?
I wish more men in the house will answer this question too.
Them no fit answer because them dey fear 😂😂😂
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To answer your question @jmiss101 men in our part of the world are seen as strong and blood, they are expected to bear pain with smiling face, carry heavy shifts as if it as light as toilet paper and more
Most men while growing up were deprived of some necessities most importantly attention from their mothers so they grow up learning to bottle things up in their minds be it the good, the bad or the ugly situation.
Seventy percent of the men we have nowadays grow up to figure things out on thier own, only few of them had someone to mentor or monitor them while they were growing.
Lastly, traumatic experience from their past or previous relationship makes them hold back and not show their emotions. I have had a guy say that I don't want her to know I love her, it will get into her head and she will start to misbehave.
To correct this narrative, families with boy children should raise them with affection, allow them to express themselves and engage them in conversation about their emotions from time to time.
Wow
Seriously?
So, someone else made a similar statement.
That's sad.
I hope things change and get better.
Thank you very much dear this.
I really appreciate your input.
It's a pleasure. Have a great time
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@bhetea01 yes I have been made to feel not enough through comparison but I made sure to give the person a piece of my mind and moved on. Shit treated case closed.
Wouldn't you like to share how exactly the person did that....
I'm curious 🧐
@bhetea01
Hive is a society.
And you know in a functional society, to be relevant, you need to solve problems.
So, if you want to be recognized be creative.
Also be real and engage.
Engagement helps one to network and grow.
For example a politician that is going for a post, will have to meet, associate with lots of people creating awareness also getting to know people.
Through this process, you learn, explore and enlarge your coast.
I hope this helps.
I am still a novice.
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