I'm sure everyone has had that occasion where they are in a conversation, then later at night they think about all the things they should have said. That's literally me every conversation.
I think this is really really common. Every now and then I absolutely nail it in conversations and other times I will think of what I should have said later, in the shower, or while strugging once again to get to sleep. Often for me it is something charming I should or could have said to a girl I found attractive, but you don't have this issue because you are married. I am extremely confident and charismatic once I have had a few hours to think of something witty and creative to say to a beautiful woman
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I probably used to be the same way, but then you run the risk of the conversation not going the way you had planned when you plan it all out like that. It's probably one of the biggest things I wish I could change about myself.
I think that a person just needs to be willing to fail at their wit every now and then but then again maybe don't swing for the fences with people being as sensitive as they are these days. I sometimes think about the things I used to say to mostly girls when I was in my early 20's and that sort of stuff really wouldn't fly today. Times have changed, that's for sure.
The last time I was in the States I was warned by some friends about how "you can't say that" about a lot of things. I wasn't even being offensive in my own eyes but according to them I was out of line. We aren't so sensitive over here... not sure exactly what changed.